My story isn't the same as everyone else but when my first son was born I went from working full-time and being very socially active to suddenly feeling a little overwhelmed by all my new mom duties and not talking to any adults most of the days. Those early days as a mom were beautiful and wonderful but also a bit isolating at times.
Here are 5 tips to help you feel more connected!
1. Find Friends Who GET IT
In the first couple of months as a mom I found solace in a group of other new moms that honestly helped me more than anything else in those first few months as a new mom. But, one of the hardest things to do when you are feeling isolated, depressed, exhausted, and overwhelmed is reach out to strangers. But as counterintuitive as it felt it was just the thing I really needed. I was craving connection to other women who could truly understand the transition I was going through as a new mother. I found some wonderful women and first time moms through my birthing class, as well as on Meetup.com, but I also recommend joining local FB Mom groups and doing your best to commit to yourself to going to a few events. Even if you get there and have to leave shortly after - just go. You never know who you might meet and from there you can plan your own get togethers and continue to get to know them.
2. Leave The House
This is often easier said that done but usually worth it. Even if you don't meet up with someone the fresh air or even the occasional 'hello' to a stranger helps you to feel like you are a member of society as opposed to a sleep deprived zombie. When I say leave the house I mean any and all ways. Go for a walk in your neighborhood, go to Target and just look at stuff (or shop), meet up with someone for coffee or lunch, sign up for a baby and me yoga class...... I should note that this doesn't necessarily mean everyday. Sometimes, leaving the house can be more stressful than the benefits that come with it. But on a day where baby seems to be calm and you are feeling up to it - get out and just be a part of the world. It really helps.
3. Talk To Your Baby!
Babies are people too and they love to hear the sound of your voice. It's part of what has connected them to you even before birth. So talk to them. Tell them what you are going to do that day or describe how you are giving them a bath or changing their diaper, doing the dishes or laundry or anything else you are up to. They will love listening and just talking to someone helps you feel a bit more connected.
4. Form a Text Group
Once you find a few people from step 1 who you can kinda connect to even if it is just on a new mom to new mom level - form a text group with them. When my twins were born, I knew 8 different moms who had babies within 6 weeks of my boys. I texted them all and asked them if they wanted to be part of a text group where we could connect, vent, get advice, share in our triumphs and keep in touch even when we were all up in the middle of the night feeding our babes. Only 2 of them opted in but it was the BEST! Up at 2 am..... guess what?! one of them usually was awake also. We talked about EVERYTHING. Recovery post partum, baby sleep (or lack of it), feedings, weight gain, emotions, and funny memes that helped us crack a smile when we really needed it.
5. Make Some PLANS
Have things on the calendar - not too many that you become overwhelmed but a few things that you can look forward to. Whether it's a lunch date with your babe and partner or a mani/pedi with your girlfriends or a bbq - ANYTHING that makes you look forward to it - make the plans and put it on the calendar. When you have those super long isolating days it will really help to have those things to look forward to.